This is the first article in the identities series that will discuss facets of identity, how to balance them, protect them and how they relate to mental health. Let's begin by discussing the facets of identity that come up the most for me in working with South Asian clients: Race, Ethnicity, and Nationality.
It goes without saying that many of us have been asked the dreaded question, “Where are you from?” That question is difficult to answer for A LOT of reasons. First, it's often only asked because we usually do not look “American” (White passing). Are we supposed to reduce our identity to just mention our ancestry? Do we say American -- in my case, Canadian -- because that's where we were raised, and neglect our South Asian bits? Do we say Asian because that is how the American Census clumps us? Or, do we pick the country our parents were raised in but left? How reductive do we get?
What if I told you, you could say all of those things or none of those things? When asked questions like “Where are you from?” we often feel a need to place ourselves in a box to make it simple for the person in front of us. But our truth is not simple! Our identities are not simple and so we don't need to provide a simple answer. We are allowed to be all of those things at one time.
images by Freepik
It’s important to remember that all three facets (race, ethnicity, and nationality) are social constructs. That means that their definitions are not printed in stone. Their definitions are malleable and likely to change over time, as they already have. The construct of race began by sorting people into three categories of Caucasoid, Mongoloid, and Negroids, based on their skulls size and relative geographical area. Thankfully, today, it’s a much more nuanced construct.
Let's break it down even further. The first facet would be race. To categorize people based on their phenotypic characteristics is to define them based on their race. In America, race was initially viewed through a Black-White phenotype binary. This phenotypic construct is much more nuanced for South Asians. South Asians do not look, speak, or act the same simply because we are from the same (extremely large) geographical region as other South Asians. The census blurs our nuance further when it categorizes us as "Asians." But the experiences of South Asian Americans differ significantly from those of East and Southeast Asian Americans because of historical, cultural, and socio-economic factors. Race is often an identity that is ascribed to us and not of our choosing.
The second facet to understand is ethnicity. Ethnicity is closely tied to cultural heritage, religion, language, cultural practices, and geographic regions within South Asia, such as Gujrat, Tamil-Nadu, and Nepal. Ethnicity is based on a similarity of cultural traditions and defined differently for everyone. If someone were to ask me for my ethnicity, I would say Punjabi. It’s the region of South Asia that my parents came from and it's the language I speak. Being Punjabi has cultural significance in my life, it dictates how I interact with my family and friends, my community and how I celebrate different holidays. Ethnicity is something we achieve and decide for ourselves.
A third facet of identity is nationality. Nationality is the legal relationship you have with different countries. I am a Canadian citizen and therefore would identify as Canadian. My parents are also Canadian citizens, and so they could also self-identify as Canadians. However, they were born and raised in India, and India was their first legal nationality. So, if I were to ask them, “Where are you from?” it is likely that their stronger bond to their Indian identity would prompt them to self-identify as being from India (their original nationality) rather than their current Canadian nationality.
When I think about what factors drive my decision making, I know family is at the forefront. It is a value passed along from my Punjabi cultural heritage. When I think about my career choice, I think about my family and religion’s commitment to social justice. When I think about my interpersonal relationships and where I feel most comfortable, I think of the multicultural aspect of Canada. Given all that, if someone were to ask me, where are you from, my response would be: “I’m a Canadian of Punjabi descent.” Because those two parts of my identity largely define my values and encompass who I am. However, balancing those two identities is a task of its own; that we will get into in the next article.
To answer the question, “Where are you from?” for yourself, begin by thinking about what values are important to you and where they originate from.
What part of your identity do you see having the most effect on your interactions with co-workers/peers?
What’s most important to you when you make a decision?
What implications do you think about when making decisions?
Which identities have the strongest effect on how you see yourself as a person?
We would love to hear your thoughts on identity and support you in your journey of self-exploration and self-acceptance. Contact us for a free consultation or to set an appointment for individual therapy now!
